The Aggressive Couch

Powered by Diet Water

Time to Hump the Donuts

| August 23, 2016

The good thing about not blogging for a while is that I have so many interesting things to talk about! Today, we ordered pizza. There’s about a billion and one delivery places here, unlike Dover, which had 3, all pizza. That being said, none of them are quite as good as the pizza place in […]

Ersatz Shanker

| July 1, 2015

Look what Kelsey Grammer is now endorsing!

Wwaabbi Holes

| June 24, 2015

I found a huge suppository of Cookin’ Cheap episodes! Barely watchable, but still. It’s a cooking show. Like you need to see what they’re doing.

Dream Week Peters Out

| June 10, 2015

I don’t remember what I dreamed last night. It wasn’t very interesting, though, I remember that much. Hey! Chicken in the Rough is still in business!

More Boring Dreams

| June 6, 2015

Last night, I dreamed I was living somewhere that was over-run with turtles. Not C. Turtle, either. Actual turtles. I vaguely recall that I was the one responsible for this. I also recall that my dad had killed one of the big ones, and was marinating it in the fridge. I was kind of upset, […]

My Painful Addiction

| April 29, 2015

My name is Dave, and I am an addict. I am addicted to ‘nanners!

No Wonder We Couldn’t Think of More…

| February 21, 2015

At the Mensa party today, we were trying to think of famous people who died from autoerotic asphyxiation. We got David Carradine and Michael Hutchence.  Recognize anybody else on this list? I don’t.

Carruther’s Heights

| February 18, 2015

Have you checked in with Mr. Breakfast?

Football Fox Predictions for 2013!

| January 1, 2015

Football Fox here. And here are my fearless predictions for the season of “foots balls”. Grouse are proving tastier than robins this year, so that means the Patriots will be eliminated in the early playoffs. That stupid farmer almost caught me in that damn trap again. I interpret this to mean the Cowboys will be […]

Couch Breaks Christmas Silence

| December 28, 2014

I wasn’t going to update until after New Years, but I have to tell you about this. UNBELIEVABLE fights break out in the food courts of malls in Tennessee and Chicago. Police were called! You have no idea the amount of joy this brings into my life.       I’ll leave it up to […]