The Aggressive Couch

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What’s That Crunching Sound

| July 29, 2011

So, the junior Republican representatives are roadblocking Boner’s tax bill because it isn’t ‘extreme’ enough. They were elected to make a stand on PRINCIPLES, dammit, not to govern! And now the Democrats have largely lined up behind their leader, Jon Stewart. Where was this discipline, say, during the health care reform debate? If they’d acted […]

All Hail Satan

| July 28, 2011

The Camaro is done!

You sicken me

| July 27, 2011

McDonald’s, has announced they are changing the happy meal. They are putting in half the portion for the fries. Or, you can have the apples without caramel sauce. McDonald’s should be ashamed of themselves. Caving to wimpy parents and healthy consumer groups. Their claim is centered on obesity. Parents, are the worst offenders. You should […]

Grill O. Mattt

| July 26, 2011

You know, for all it’s hype, the Kindle doesn’t make good kindling.

Aggressive Couch NUMBER ONE: Frankly, This is Crap

| July 25, 2011

Next month is our SECOND ANNIVERSARY. In celebration, I present to you: the very first Aggressive Couch! Frankly, it was crap. Not up to our usual high standards. Not even up to ‘filler’ standards. Don’t complain if you think this one’s awful. In fact, don’t even listen to it. I’m sorry we posted it. Go […]

Bot Race Update!

| July 22, 2011

We’ve had approx. 120 “unique” human visitors over the last month. I guess advertising in those urinals has payed off! The big news, though, is that Russia has dropped out of the race as far as bots are concerned. China is making a good showing with around 20%, and Japan is pulling a strong 30%, […]

100 Degrees C in the Shade

| July 21, 2011

Now that it’s record-settingly hot, can we track down those assholes who said ‘what global warming?’ last January and kick them in the nuts?

Strip to the Waist

| July 20, 2011

I am definitely able to focus better, but I am more irritable than ever. I no longer fall asleep during boring meetings, I get angry during them!

End it

| July 19, 2011

Queensryche’s, has new album. Now wonder there is a heat destroying most of the country. This is a punishment for letting this happen! Oh mighty Stipe! Send this back to New Jersey!

Aggressive Sectional 12: This Time, It’s Again

| July 19, 2011

So! It’s an Aggressive Sectional! This time, we just randomly selected bits from, uh, Couch number something and something else. We forgot, ok? It’s not easy procrastinating and forgetting drums everywhere. Anyway, I’m going to go for a walk and then go to bed. Wait. I scheduled this post for midnight. So I’ll have been […]