The New Aggressive Couch!

Everybody is posting things about how 2016 was a festering shitpile of fuck, but I’ll take a different tack. Overall, this was a below average year. But so many great things happened to me that I can’t join in with the negativity.

1. I bought a new house, which has been great so far. I’m a little annoyed with the traffic (you can pretty much forget about going anywhere during rush hour) but just for the restaurant delivery options alone, this place is worth it.
2. Bought a 2006 Ford Focus and a 2013 Cadillac ATS! Been jonesing for one of those all year. Guess which one. Also, got rid of Grimace the Impala and the Trans Am and the Turtle colored Seville! Fixed the headlights on the Beagle and gave it to Michelle Motter!
3. Saw Norr in person, twice!
4. I was featured in the company newsletter, autocrossing the Focus!
5. My band, Who, Me? successfully played a show at some guy’s house! We’ve been practicing regularly! We have a bunch of new songs!
6. I bought a riding lawn mower. Sometimes Michelle lets me ride it!
7. We bought a shed to use for Cee Turtle’s playhouse! Well, and to store the lawn mower.
8. REPTILE LAND! We even got to meet Clyde Peeling!
9. Started going to the gym. And we’ve managed to keep going!
10. They still haven’t found the body of that pizza delivery guy I buried under my old trailer Got a big raise at work!

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This entry was posted by Dave on Saturday, December 31st, 2016 at 2:23 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.