The Aggressive Couch

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| October 20, 2012

Does anyone remember the good old days when “log on” referred to beating women with large sticks?

I’ll Never Be Your Beast of Eric Burden

| October 19, 2012

Did anyone guess I was away on vacation all week and wrote all these entries one after another last Thursday? What do you mean, you don’t care?

The Best of Bread

| October 18, 2012

Yes, Harry, I know. I’m sorry I left that flaming sack of manure on your parent’s porch. But I wrote “With Love from JD” on it.

Levitate Me

| October 17, 2012

Come on pilgrim, you know he loves you! Was Black Chris Frank Thompson Francis Black prescient? Or is that song not about Jerry Sandusky? If I do buy that windowless black van, I’m calling it the Sanduskymobile.

Ape Nuts

| October 16, 2012

Don’t you hate pirating a CD only to find it only has one good song on it? Almost makes me wish I’d paid for it. You know what else I hate? When the hot water runs out during shower sex. Or shower masturbation. Or when the water line to your house breaks altogether. And does […]

Hulk Hogan banging

| October 16, 2012

I’m not really into gossip and all that shit. But, the big gossip story is the Hulk Hogan sex tape. I know you were demanding the Macho Man and Slim Jim guy tape. Macho man having his way with the slim Jim guy.Oh Yeah! Anyway, Hogan is banging his friends wife in the video. But […]

Save Those Gift Cards!

| October 15, 2012

Can you believe tomorrow is Valentine’s Day?

There Won’t Be Another One Like It

| October 14, 2012

So today is Monday. Another day of big work. Do aphids live like this?

Perfect Sundae

| October 13, 2012

Today is a great day to go fishing. I’ve been using my own form of “stink bait”. I can’t tell you what it is, but it is brown and “marmorated”.

Elvis Has Just Left the Outhouse

| October 12, 2012

Ever notice that the aroma around an outhouse isn’t as bad as you’d expect? Unless the previous person had the shits or eats a lot of garlic or something. But that’s true of any toilet. The reason I’m bringing this up is that I just shit on the floor.